Author: Phil Schneider

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Locked In

Man locked in a roomBeing awake and unable to speak, unable to communicate has to be one of the worst ways to live.

Once, in high school, I had to have surgery. When I woke up, I was nauseous, weak, and unable to speak. While in that state of post-anesthetic paralysis, all I could do was steam for help in my own head as a doctor behind a curtain ordered a pizza with what sounded to me like the most disgusting assortment of toppings imaginable.

Within a few minutes of standing up, I vomited.

I don’t think of that moment often, but today I did as I had a similar experience.

I was trying to get somewhere this morning when three of four different “domestic” issues—nothing serious at all—and I don’t know why but immediately my stress level skyrocketed.

For no good or even discernible reason.

But there I was, seething because my dear, sweet family dared to interact with me.

Not my proudest moment, but not really my focus here either.

No, my focus is my inability to articulate my emotions or to even speak when I get upset.

After all the benign issues were handled, I left to take my daughter to where she needed to go and, the whole way there, I couldn’t speak, couldn’t talk about what happened, couldn’t talk about the day, couldn’t ask her questions about her day which was going to be filled with lots of fun and exciting events.

I was locked in by my anger.

It’s happened so many times, and it’s paralyzing. I can’t tell people I’m trapped, and yet if they poke me hard enough, the bubble will burst and all of my anger and rage will pour on so poor, unsuspecting person.

Usually a loved one.

So, I’m writing this for those moments, when I’m locked in, when I can’t explain, can’t speak, but that I love them and will hopefully be back soon.

(Featured Image Modified from Original)

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Blog Deep Thoughts Showing My Work

Heaven (06-12-23)

“Heaven is a well-kept lawn.”

Has someone said that? I can’t remember. It’s true, in a way. God gave Adam and already flourishing garden and told him to steward and cultivate it.

To steward is to preserve. To cultivate is to change.

God has created us to be creators. We use His creation to make our own. We preserve order and goodness, while changing it to suite our creative vision. This is worship.

Aerial painting of an elaborate lawn

This is part of my Public Domain Derivation Series.

HT Public Domain Review

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Color Explosion

They say you can’t hear explosions in space,
But you can you see them?
Can you see the color?
Can you feel the rich purple,
Spread across the deep, ink of God’s first landscape?

God loves to finger paint,
To redecorate with the pieces and colors scattered about.
He works in oranges and yellows,
Painting against a star-speckled canvas,
Blowing up the darkness,
With glorious, color and light.

This is part of my “Inspired by Space” Series.


Title: Cygnus Loop Supernova Blast Wave

Full Description:

This is an image of a small portion of the Cygnus Loop supernova remnant, which marks the edge of a bubble-like, expanding blast wave from a colossal stellar explosion, occurring about 15,000 years ago. The Hubble Space Telescope (HST) image shows the structure behind the shock waves, allowing astronomers for the first time to directly compare the actual structure of the shock with theoretical model calculations. Besides supernova remnants, these shock models are important in understanding a wide range of astrophysical phenomena, from winds in newly-formed stars to cataclysmic stellar outbursts. The supernova blast is slamming into tenuous clouds of insterstellar gas. This collision heats and compresses the gas, causing it to glow. The shock thus acts as a searchlight revealing the structure of the interstellar medium. The detailed HST image shows the blast wave overrunning dense clumps of gas, which despite HST’s high resolution, cannot be resolved. This means that the clumps of gas must be small enough to fit inside our solar system, making them relatively small structures by interstellar standards.

A bluish ribbon of light stretching left to right across the picture might be a knot of gas ejected by the supernova; this interstellar “bullet” traveling over three million miles per hour (5 million kilometers per hour) is just catching up with the shock front, which has slowed down by ploughing into interstellar material. The Cygnus Loop appears as a faint ring of glowing gases about three degrees across (six times the diameter of the full Moon), located in the northern constellation, Cygnus the Swan. The supernova remnant is within the plane of our Milky Way galaxy and is 2,600 light-years away. The photo is a combination of separate images taken in three colors, oxygen atoms (blue) emit light at temperatures of 30,000 to 60,000 degrees Celsius (50,000 to 100,000 degrees Farenheit). Hydrogen atoms (green) arise throughout the region of shocked gas. Sulfur atoms (red) form when the gas cools to around 10,000 degrees Celsius (18,000 degrees Farenheit).

Image Number:PR93-01

Date: January 1, 1993

SOURCE

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Blog Deep Thoughts Showing My Work

Creators (06-01-23)

God has made us creators!

Lines and dots—that’s all it takes to create the idea, the image of a world. We we are creators, endowed by our Creator with this power. He has made us in His image: creative, imaginative, and resourceful. Of course, we cannot create anything out of nothing. Only He can do that. But He wants us to create from what He has created. Eden was not set in stone. Adam was there to steward and cultivate, to preserve creation and to recreate as befit Adam’s vision for the world God gave him. We create as He gives us resources and vision.

This is part of my Public Domain Derivation Series.

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Blog Deep Thoughts Showing My Work

Bigger World (05-18-23)

Reality is More than We Perceive

The world is bigger than we think. Beyond the physical world, there is something more. All of our beliefs, values, hopes, dreams—all of it screams to us, calls out to us to wake us to this hidden reality.

“Lif[e] is not just what you see!” If we were only quiet enough to hear our heart song!

And yet—the world is smaller than we think. War, famine, crime, oppression—these big issues are actually smaller than we think. They all start across the street, across the country. If we are worried about the world, then let’s do something about it.

This is part of my Public Domain Derivation Series.

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Blog Showing My Work

God’s Moon

God’s moon
His creation
Man’s monument
Our variation

Guardian of night
Obelisk for the dead
Reflecting light
Lifting our heads

The best of us
Cannot touch the skies
Cannot pierce the veil
Where God Himself resides
And so He descends
And walks upon the Earth
And dies for us
To show us our worth

This is part of my “Inspired by Space” Series.


Title: Supermoon Lunar Eclipse

Full Description: A perigee full moon, or supermoon, is seen behind the Washington Monument during a total lunar eclipse on Sunday, September 27, 2015, in Washington, DC. The combination of a supermoon and total lunar eclipse last occurred in 1982 and will not happen again until 2033. Photo Credit: (NASA/Aubrey Gemignani)

Image Number: NHQ201509270103

Date: September 27, 2015

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